Enjoy The Process

In all endeavors, there is a process to get from point A to point B. Learning to walk is a process, so was taking a vacation. You have to pack, get to the airport, go through security, board the plane, arrive at your vacation spot, and God forbid, don’t forget anything. Whatever you’re trying to improve in your life, please enjoy the process.

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Learn To Enjoy The Process

In the past, I didn’t enjoy the process of anything. The process of going on vacation was such a hassle it diminished the fun of the first few days for me. In contrast, today, I have learned to love the process as much or more than the result.

Last week, I was gifted an excellent example of what I am talking about. The Mrs. and I were at the Driving Range hitting golf balls. We recently took up the game, and neither of us is good at it. As we were hitting, and the balls were going wherever they wanted to, I heard behind me a distinct word beginning with a F***. Turning around, I saw a man swing, hit the ball, and immediately shout F***! He didn’t look like he was having a good time.


Sofia and I would swing, hit the ball, analyze what we did wrong, and rejoice when we hit it well. We understand to become good at something is a process. It might take 10,000 swings before we hit the ball consistently well.

It is important for us to play well, so we signed up for a lesson with a professional. Within five swings, I hit the ball straighter, farther, and with more consistency. It is all a process. Soon we will be able to drive around a course and enjoy the game with friends.


Enjoying The Process Of Writing

I have finished the first draft of Chapter 1 of my book; yea me! I enjoy the process of writing. Opening up my creativity and coming up with the story brings me joy. Once I begin, I don’t want to stop, but it is hard to walk after sitting for hours writing. I should get a timer and move around every twenty minutes or so.

I am not focused on the end result of my novel or golf game. The only thoughts, and more importantly, feelings I have, are about the joy of the process. Feeling happy while I’m in the process increases my vibration and attracts more ideas. It is how I open up my creativity. Before I pick up my pen, I like to meditate and open myself up, getting the creative juices flowing.

Enjoy Getting Healthy

Most people who want to get healthy don’t enjoy the process; I know I never did. They are just like me and want to skip the monotonous, exhausting process of changing their diet and exercise. Like me, they want to skip all that and get to the results. They suffer through it, but that is the wrong approach.

For example, my daughter Nicole is training for a fitness competition in June. Every morning she eats plain oatmeal, cinnamon, and an egg white. In support of her, I am eating the same. It is tasteless gruel, and we complain to each other and suffer. I realized that was only attracting negativity. We started looking at the meal not as gruel but as a healthy meal that will help her win. It is part of the process of changing our bodies, and we enjoy it.

How Do You View Situations?

It is all how you look at things. Focus on enjoying the process, and the results will come. I hope and pray everyone is well. I appreciate every one of you who takes the time to visit my site and read my posts.




3 Relaxation Techniques

It is important to function at your highest level. You cannot be at your best when you are tense. Tension is not good for your health and can lead to heart problems and other diseases. In addition, tension can sap your energy and stifle your creativity. Learning how to relax can improve your life. Today I will talk about 3 relaxation techniques.

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Techniques For Relaxation

Currently, I am learning to play golf, and it is a great example of the benefits of relaxation. Learning to hit a golf ball is not hard; after all, it is not moving. I have learned to hit the ball but hitting it straight and far is another matter. As I learn to relax my body, hands, and mind, I began to hit the balls farther and straighter. When I tense any part of my body, who knows where that ball is going. My mind has to be perfectly quiet for me to have a good stroke.

I have spent much of my life dealing with intense situations. When we were conducting undercover operations, we always had to be on high alert. Most of the traffickers would kill without a second thought. I had to learn how to relax and stay calm in the tensest situations. If not, my mind would not function properly. I called it relaxed tension. I looked calm on the outside.

Benefits Of Relaxation

To be able to experience the benefits of relaxation, you must be able to relax both your interbody and your outer body. Today I use these relaxation techniques daily. It keeps my mind calm and helps me focus and be creative. Here are 3 relaxation techniques.


The first is simply breathing. Currently, I live in Florida, close to sea level. At sea level, I only use ¼ to ½ of my lung capacity when breathing. Therefore, I perform breathing exercises every morning to inflate my entire lungs.

Begin by sitting upright and tall with good posture. Try to relax your muscles and breathe in through your nose until you feel your belly rounding out. Breathe out through your nose, emptying your lungs and bringing your navel toward your spine. Try to breathe to a slow 4-Count rhythm. Do this seven times.

On the next breath in, expand your rib cage. Feel your lungs filling with more oxygen and your ribs stretching. Keep the 4-Count rhythm and do this seven times. Last, breathe in until you feel your chest lifting and your lungs filling. Slowly breathe out until your lungs are empty and pull your navel toward your spine. Do this at least seven times. You will begin to feel your muscles relax.


Take Your Time

Another technique for relaxation incorporates the entire body. This technique takes some time, so have at least 30 minutes of uninterrupted quiet time. Find a place where you will not be disturbed and create a comfortable place to lie down and stretch out. You will never be able to fully relax if you’re not comfortable.

I also like to put in earphones and listen to calming music. Begin by closing your eyes and relaxing your right toes and foot. Keep going slowly up your right leg, relaxing your ankle and calf. Picture waves of warm, soothing water washing over you. Continue slowly up your right leg until you get to your hip. Repeat the same exercise for your left foot and leg. Take your time and feel your legs relax.

Inside And Outside

Continue up your torso, feeling your body relaxing, on the inside and outside. Picture your inner body and each organ beginning to relax. Once you have relaxed your legs and torso, begin at your fingers and work your way up through your right arm and then your left arm. Relax your head and picture your brain still and calm. Remain in this state for at least 20 minutes. After, open your eyes and take three deep breaths, then slowly roll over to your side and stand up. I always feel both calm and energetic after doing this relaxation technique.

Embrace Your Inner Child

The last technique is a simple one but great for relaxation. It can be done quickly or last several hours. I learned this technique when I volunteered as a facilitator at a grief counseling horse farm. It is coloring mandalas. Mandalas are a graphic and often symbolic pattern usually in the form of a circle divided into four separate sections.

When the instructor handed out the mandalas and crayons, I was skeptical. How is this going to relax me? I had not colored since I was a child. Imagine, a 50 something-year-old man sitting at a table with a box of crayons and coloring a mandala.

It Really Worked

I was amazed at how quickly it worked. My mind stopped thinking, and I felt a wave of relaxing energy sweep over me. Today, when I feel tense, I will print out a blank mandala and begin to color in the different shapes. I can color all of it or just part. It doesn’t matter; it is about the process, not the outcome.

I hope these 3 relaxation techniques work as well for you. Do you have any relaxation techniques that you use? If so, let me know in the comments section. I appreciate everyone who takes their time to read, like, and follow my blog. Keep focusing on the process, and I will see you next week.




Learning The Game Of Golf

That’s right, my better half and I are learning the game of golf. I never took the time or had the patience before to take up the game. Why would we take on this challenge at this point in our lives? First, I believe that age is just a number. Ask anyone over the age of 50 and, most will tell you the same thing. I use my age as a reason and not an excuse. Second, it is something we want to do. It’s that simple.

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It Is Not Easy Learing The Game Of Golf

We signed up for a clinic at the beginning of the year. I was thinking most people taking the clinic would be young and we would look out of place. Boy, I was wrong. Most people are my age or older and, the majority are women. I found out that many seniors begin learning the game of golf. Seniors pick up the game faster because we have more free time to practice.

My approach to the game is like a baby learning to walk. The baby doesn’t get frustrated when they fall. It is just the opposite; they laugh and try again. They keep trying until they can stand, then they take a step. Soon they don’t fall as much and become consistent. They keep walking, wobbly at first until they achieve balance. It is not long before they look like they have always been walking.

First Golf Lesson

On our first day, while waiting for the lesson to start, we met a few people who asked how long we had been playing. When we told them this was our first day, I kept hearing the word frustrating. “You must not have enough frustration in your life,” one woman said to me. Another quipped, “get ready to be frustrated.” You know, I didn’t get frustrated at all that day. Later, I realized these women focused on the outcome and not the process.


Sofia and I were there to have fun, nothing more. We didn’t have any certain outcome in mind. We were having fun and, there is no frustration in having fun. Our only goal was to become more consistent in hitting the ball. We are enjoying this new journey we have set out on.

Remember Why You Started

Learning the game of golf is frustrating only if the game controls you. Like anything, remember why you started playing in the first place. Was it to have fun? If so, go, have fun regardless of where the ball lands. Did you want to meet people? Golf is an excellent way to meet people for personal or business reasons. Go, play and make new friends.

I am glad we are learning the game of golf even though we are not very good at it yet. On our travels, to Colorado, we met a vibrant and energetic 80-year-old woman. She golfed, skied, hiked, and did anything she wanted to do. I learned from her to give up all excuses and start doing those things that I want to do. There’s nothing I can do about my arthritis and bone spurs from previous injuries. The fatigue from my chemotherapy treatments will always be there. My body is always going to hurt if I’m lying in bed or learning the game of golf. I no longer use any excuses. If it is something I want to do, it will be done.

Go, Do It

If there’s something that you would like to do in your life, go, do it. Don’t hold back or wait too long. Dump all your excuses and go live the life you want to live. I appreciate everyone who takes the time to read my blogs. Don’t forget to like, comment, and follow. Go, be the best you.