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Gloom Despair And Agony On Me

Gloom, Despair, and Agony on me. How those words brought back a lot of great memories. I used to watch a TV show with my mom and dad back in the 70s called, Hee Haw. It was a show with country comedians and musicians that would perform various skits. One of those skits had two performers singing the song Gloom Despair and Agony on me. Then they would say something funny about their trials and tribulations. They would repeat the song until another funny story. This was one of the funniest skits and it makes me laugh today thinking about it.

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Gloom And Despair

2021 has not been kind to me. Nope, not one bit. Most people couldn’t wait for 2020 to end. I for one wouldn’t mind going back. Yes, this is me, the guy that’s always talking about moving forward. I am that guy but I would gladly rewind the clock and go back a year.

Why you say? Well, I’ll tell you. It seems as if Life has put me in her crosshairs since the beginning of the year. I have taken blow after blow after blow. Every time I overcome one punch and think things are getting better, she throws an uppercut. Hits me right on the chin. It has been so bad I began to feel despair. The words to that song flooded my brain, Gloom Despair and Agony on me.

Despair Defined

Despair is defined as loss of hope; a cause of hopelessness. This is what I was feeling just the other day. People have called me a lot of different things in my life. The one thing no one has ever called me was a quitter. So I fought on with every weapon I had. I wasn’t losing ground but I wasn’t gaining any either.

So as I continued to take punch after punch, bad news after bad news, I began to wonder what was coming next. Luckily I don’t ever take on these battles alone. I have my family, my friends, and God. On one particularly bad day, I went to bed and as I always do I picked up a devotional guide, Feeding On Jesus by Jennifer Arimborgo. Jennifer is a wonderful person who is a missionary in the Amazon Jungle in Peru. Her website is feedingonjesus.com.

Devotionals

The devotional I turned to that night was Isaiah 35:4, “Say to those who are fearful-hearted, ‘Be strong, do not fear! Behold, your God will come with vengeance, with the recompense of God; He will come and save you.’” I immediately was lifted out of my despair. God knows when you’re feeling hopeless and places hope in front of you.

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https://unsplash.com/@anakin1814

I knew right then that everything was going to be okay. In the words of Rocky Balboa, “The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it.” I knew I had to take the hits and keep moving forward.

Control

I can’t control what life throws at me. Neither can you. Two things I can control are my attitude and effort. I can control my thoughts and not give in to despair. I believe and have faith that things will turn around. Some situations are too big for you and me to handle. These are the ones I turn over to God.

Persevere

There have been several times in my life that I have sailed through troubled waters. Each time God has sent me a sign to tell me he is there and everything will be all right. I am lucky I have this great team of family, friends, and God. Together we can get through any storm. Because of them, I have been able to persevere through the difficult times in my life.

Even though this year has been a struggle for me, I know there are better times ahead. The years to come will be filled with difficulty but also with much happiness. Whatever life wants to throw at me in the future, I’m ready for it. I have God by my side. In the end, the good times will far outweigh the bad.

Cites

https://unsplash.com/@jeremyperkins

Eliminating Doubt For Personal Development

I’ve talked about this in several previous articles and want to discuss it more thoroughly today. I’m talking about those little creatures that hide deep inside our minds. The ones that pop up at the worst of times. Their only function is to prevent you from living the life you so richly deserve. Yes, I am talking about those dreaded “Doubt Demons!” There they are, waiting for the right time to come out. They are dug in deep and camouflaged. It is imperative to stifle these demons. If at all possible, they should be eradicated. Eliminating doubt for personal development must become a priority.

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“The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.”
~ Sylvia Plath

 “When you doubt your power, you give power to your doubt.”
~ Honore de Balzac

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Eliminating Doubt

In my previous post, “Inspirational Quotes about Your Gifts,” I gave you a definition of success. “Success is the completion and the fulfillment of the original purpose of your existence.” For you to have success, you must know what Doubt Demons are and where they come from. Just like a cancer in the body, Doubt Demons are there to destroy you. Doubt Demons are those little voices and thoughts inside your head. They are constantly telling you that you can’t do it. They will stunt your personal development and must be eliminated.

 “Worry, doubt, fear, and despair are the enemies which slowly bring us down to the ground and turn us to dust before we die.”
~ Anonymous

“If you are going to doubt anything in life, doubt your own limitations.”
~ Dan Brule

Fear creates Doubt Demons just like it creates all demons. They are particularly active right after you make a decision to change yourself for the better. Have you ever tried to lose weight and began to get cravings for unhealthy foods? Doubt Demons. If you’ve ever attempted to get a promotion, you might have started noticing the quality of the other candidates. You begin to compare yourself with them and believe that they are better. Doubt Demons. Did you start a business for financial freedom? Were you engulfed in fear, after you made that decision? Did you ask yourself, “how will I pay the bills?” Doubt Demons.

“Successful people have fear, successful people have doubts, and successful people have worries. They just don’t let these feelings stop them.”
~ T. Harv Eker

“Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will.”
~ Suzy Kassem

How Do Our Thoughts Form?

Any thought you have that fills you with fear is placed there by the Doubt Demons. Where do they come from? Unfortunately, these Doubt Demons can be given life inadvertently. When we are young and our thoughts are forming, we are very vulnerable. As we go through our personal growth our thoughts are developing. Many times adults place Doubt Demons into our subconscious mind inadvertently. They don’t realize the harm they are doing. Often your parents, teachers, etc. have tried to protect you from disappointment. They say things like, “he’s just shy,” “she’s not a good test taker,” or “it takes money to make money.”

Teacher in front of her students

“Don’t waste life in doubts and fears.”
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

 “Doubt is only removed by action. If you’re not working then that’s where doubt comes in.”
~ Conor McGregor

Any statement such as the ones above give life to these Doubt Demons. Imagine what will happen if you want to ask out the girl of your dreams but you have been told that you are shy. You want to go to the college of your choice but are “not a good test taker.” Doubt Demons are not exclusively given life just when we’re young. They can also be placed in us as adults by our coworkers and friends. Have you ever told a friend about a big dream? If their response was less than enthusiastic, it gave life to your Doubt Demons.

 “Don’t let them make you doubt yourself. All the greatest visionaries in history have been told they were insane at some point.”
~ Michele Jaffe

“We all have genius within us, never doubt that fact.”
~ Catherine Pulsifer

Look For These Symptoms

What are some of the symptoms of Doubt Demons? Fear creates Doubt Demons. They feed off our internal fears, especially the six basic fears. There are six basic fears that we suffer from at different times. The fear of poverty, of criticism, of sickness, of loss, of old age, and of death. Once we decide to make a positive change in our lives, we begin to experience some of these fears. At times, it is a combination of these fears. These fears can lead to symptoms such as indecision, procrastination, gossip, and eventually quitting. Once we quit, we return to our old life which is the goal of the Doubt Demons. We must be eliminating doubt for personal development.

Fear not

Have you made the decision to start your own business? If so, you might have woken up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat. The thoughts of failure and not being able to pay your bills raced through your head. Here come your Doubt Demons invoking the fear of poverty. Do you worry about what your friends or family will say? The Doubt Demons have inserted into you the fear of criticism. This is a very powerful fear and you need to know how to handle it. For some good tips and information, you can check out my post, “A Flying Rat’s Ass.”

“I love it when people doubt me. It makes me work harder to prove them wrong.”
~ Derek Jeter

“I’ve learned that the mastery of self-doubt is the key to success.”
~ Will Smith

What To Do?

What can we do about these Doubt Demons? We know we have them, they are always with us whether we believe it or not. We must find ways to exterminate them if we can. If we can’t, we must live with them and control them. You will never be able to fulfill the intent of your existence if you don’t. Eliminating doubt for personal development is a must. Solutions for controlling/eradicating them are:

1. Identify Them. Understand your Doubt Demons for what they are. These are thoughts that have been placed in your subconscious mind and allowed to grow. That’s all they are and once you identify them, you can develop a plan to fight them.

2. Positive Affirmations. You can replace any and all thoughts placed in your mind by other people. By writing down the Doubt Demons which you have identified, you can now replace all negative thoughts with an opposite positive thought. Write down these positive thoughts and speak them out loud several times a day. Remember that your Doubt Demons have had years to grow in your mind. It won’t happen overnight, but if you develop the habit of speaking your positive affirmations daily, you will change your paradigm.

3. Release Them. Now that you have identified your Doubt Demons, began changing your paradigm through positive affirmations, you can release them. As you release them, you will see yourself changing. You will grow more confident, be more decisive, and know how to handle criticism. You will begin to live a happy life because you know how to control your fears and live by faith. It is a wonderful feeling to know that you are doing your best with the gifts God has placed inside you.

Final Thoughts

Are you eliminating doubt for your personal development? Are you struggling with anything right now? Do Doubt Demons stop you from living the lifestyle you deserve? Do you have any tips to share that would be helpful to someone who is struggling with doubt? I would love to be able to help you out. Leave your comments below. Subscribe to my email list by clicking on the blue button above and receive my checklist to keep you moving forward in attaining your goals.

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“Your faith can move mountains and your doubt can create them.”
~ Anonymous

 “The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.”
~ Franklin D. Roosevelt

All Aboard!!

“This Train Is Moving on, You Can Get on, You Can Get off, But the Train Keeps Moving on! We Are Going to the Top of the Mountain!”

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A Flying Rat’s Ass!!

No apologies! This is a topic that I’m very passionate about. If I offend you, then you need to look inward at yourself. I’m not mentioning anyone by name.

How do you value other people’s opinions? Are you caught up in the way someone else makes you feel? Can what someone says to you determine if you can have a good or bad day? If so, listen to these words carefully. I don’t give a flying rat’s ass what other people think of me. I know that I’m a good person and that I treat others in the same manner as I would want them to treat me. It has no effect on me what other people think of me or if other people don’t believe that I will accomplish what I set out to do. I learned this lesson a long time ago. When I was a child growing up I had lots of friends and thought that everyone liked me. Then I found out that some people didn’t like me and I never did anything for them to feel that way. I realized then that some people are just going to like you for who you are and some people are not going to like you for who you are. That doesn’t change who you are. You are you, no one else, embrace it.

“You create your own universe as you go along.”
– Winston Churchill

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When I was in the military, every year we would get performance evaluations from our superior officers. I would read them and take note of my shortcomings because I respected the men who wrote them. After I left the military and began working for the government I was given the gift of having a bad supervisor. This man hated life and was negative and demeaning everywhere he went. Early on in my career with DEA, I volunteered for a special operation to go live in the jungles of South America and search for cocaine labs. This entailed almost a year that I was out of my office training with the U.S. Army Rangers, attending Spanish-language training, and working in the jungle. I got back to my office after my first tour in the jungle and my supervisor gave me a bad evaluation. He said I didn’t have enough arrests or seizures. I never figured out how I was supposed to arrest someone if I wasn’t there. Maybe this moron didn’t even know I was gone. Now I had received excellent evaluations from my supervisors during training and on my deployment to South America, but he didn’t take any of those into account. Therefore, I was evaluated on what I did in his office even though I was 3,000 miles away. I know he gave me a bad evaluation so I would quit the program and not go on another deployment. It didn’t work, I went on three more deployments within the next two years. Every evaluation he gave me after that I never read. When he would call me in to discuss it I would sign it and hand it back to him. The first time he asked me, “aren’t you going to read it?” My reply was no, I don’t value your opinion. I know what kind of job I do; I know if each day I’ve given it 100 percent or less than hundred percent. Your opinion of me carries no weight with me. In other words, I didn’t give a flying rat’s ass what he thought of me.

I know when I look in the mirror each morning the kind of person that I am, what I’m going to accomplish, what I’ve already accomplished, and you need to be the same way. Who is looking back at you when you look in the mirror? What are you going to do to move forward towards accomplishing your goals? Nothing that anyone says to you should have any effect on whether you succeed or not. Only you can decide that. If some lunkhead in the gym makes a negative comment about your weight, just smile at him because you know exactly what you’re going to look like in a few months. Make sure you thank him for providing that extra motivation. If people laugh at you when you tell them you’re going to be an Oscar-winning actor even though you’ve never starred in a play, smile and remember to thank them in your acceptance speech.

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In a few posts back I wrote about “Doubt Demons” and how they show up in your mind to keep you from achieving your goals. The naysayers are the ones who instill in you these “Doubt Demons.” If you give into the naysayers then that just means that you value their opinion more than you value yourself. You have to get the attitude that you do not give a flying rat’s ass about other people’s opinions. The only opinion that matters is what comes out of your voice; the thoughts in your head. Naysayers are losers and like to be in the company of other naysayers because that’s what they attract. Successful people are attracted to successful people. Speak your goals several times throughout the day, make your goals your predominant thoughts and you will attract successful people to you who will help you accomplish them. The naysayers will disappear.

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One of the biggest obstacles you will incur and have to overcome on your journey is when the naysayers, the negative Nelly’s, the doom and gloomers, happen to be your friends or family. These are the ones that just can’t say anything positive about what you’re trying to accomplish when you’re around them. They don’t do it in a malicious way but it can do the most harm. Unfortunately sometimes the only way to overcome this obstacle is to cut them out of your life until you can show them that no matter what they say, you will not be deterred. You just can’t give a flying rat’s ass about what they’re saying. I love my parents but I could tell by the tone of their “encouragement” that they didn’t believe me when I would tell them my dreams. I had to go out and show them.

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This is your journey and you and only you decide whether you reach the top of the hill or roll back down to the bottom. If you don’t succeed you cannot point fingers at anyone but yourself. You have full control over the outcome of your journey. No one else is steering your boat or piloting your plane. You are not just along for the ride you are the captain. One thing that most people don’t understand is you are given all the tools necessary to accomplish whatever you want when you were born. Somewhere along the way you’ve let other people steal your tools from you. But all that was yesterday and yesterday doesn’t count, it’s history. What counts is today and what you do today. Tomorrow is already written and it depends on what you do today. Focus on today and continue moving forward.

Sharing

I believe in the power of sharing. If I read a good blog that really speaks to me and I believe it will provide value to others then I will share it. I have linked four books that I believe have value. In order to change you, you first have to change the way you think. Leaders Are Readers!

The Mamba Mentality: How I Play by Kobe Bryant. These are short stories about Kobe’s experiences coupled with some fantastic photos. It shows that the little things can add up to greatness. I recently listened to an interview where Kobe said he would start his first workout at 4 AM to get ahead of its competition. His mental approach to the game is what made him great.

Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. This is an oldie but goodie that is full of relevant life lessons. It is a book that you hear speaker after speaker refer to. Successful people all have the same mentality and know you have to change the way you think to be successful. Only one percent of people set goals.

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k by Mark Manson. I found this to be a sophisticated yet easy read. This book goes along with a lot of what I write about in my blog. What other people think about you doesn’t matter so you should stop getting stressed out about it. Focus all your energy on what really matters which is you and your goals.

Extreme Ownership: How US Navy Seals LEAD and WIN by Jocko Willink. A book for everyone that I found basic and clear about leadership, teamwork, and having the right mindset. It is full of great stories with useful and applicable lessons. Own every decision you make.

I also highly recommend checking out the audible membership from Amazon. I can download great books on the audible app and listen to them with my AirPods while I go on my morning walks. You can get any of these products simply by clicking on the links above. If you do purchase any products through my links I’ll get a small commission from Amazon at no additional cost to you.

I appreciate every like, follow, comment and share. Keep’em coming.

“This train is moving on, you can get on, you can get off, but the train keeps going! We are going to the top of the mountain!”